Bill the Bass

The first time I met Bill, the Big Mouth Bass, was in a guest loo at a small dinner party.  Bill was a game fish, hung above the toilet tank. I thought it an odd place to hang a hunting trophy. And even odder to name the fish. I wondered if my host ate him before he was stuffed. Coincidentally, we were having fish for dinner. I guess my host admired his trophy fish anew whenever he took a piss. I must've been talking to myself in the bathroom, because suddenly the fish went postal. I shrieked, and then giggled. I had no idea there was even such a thing as an animated fish. He slapped his tail, looked me in the eye, opened his mouth wide, then began to sing Take me to the river. Put me in the water. When I emerged several minutes later, after a good singalong with Bill, everyone was asking me if I enjoyed my pitstop and meeting Bill. I was red-faced, caught in the act of singing in the loo with a talking fish.