Tuesday, June 30, 1987

4 FREEWRITES & 4 short poems



FREEWRITE

Behind the sanatarium walls 
kids all lined up for a communal light 
during cigarette break. 
The teacher is the dispenser of fire.
At Napa, there is a subculture 
based on cigarettes. 
I begin to understand 
what my mother once said:
when she knew she was going mad,
the only thing she could relate to 
was a cigarette. The smoke curled 
from her nostrils like an angry dragon.
No one's allowed to have lighters
or their own matches here. 
A human train of smoke and fire 
weaves out of the room.
A conspiracy of tobacco.

6/30/1987, Napa
rev 9/2016


FREEWRITE

My students were born the year 
I graduated from high school, 1970.
Are they products of the love-child generation? 
I feel old. There's a 17-year gulf between us.
These kids don't know Kennedy or Vietnam. 
Some of the girls I went to high school with 
have children old enough to run away from home 
or to wind up here in this sanitarium.
These kids, how long have they been here?
Most of them left home earlier than most, 
runaways, living on the streets, in gangs,
until their world caved. Then it became
juvenile hall, a ward of the state, lockdown.
The last stop in the juvenile court system.
Will they ever leave this place, 
with its double locks, behind? 
Others will graduate to prison.
Their conversations are littered with 
When I get out... When I leave... 
it is always in the present tense.
There is always hope.
Some manage to leave this place for a while. 
Their successful matriculation 
is measured in months. 
Sometimes even in years, 
if they're lucky enough.


6/30/1987, Napa
rev 9/2016



FREEWRITE

Limpear, to clean this blimp of earth 
and the sunshine falling beneath the sky. 
Oh heavens Spears! Milton's lost again 
and we can't find the key. 
I say, llave, in Spanish. 
The car stalled and she's wearing 
green spangles on her ears. 
Someone tells me that the angels 
are loose in the library again. Again. 
And she's gone and left me alone again. 
I could walk out, have a tantrum, 
I could scream, do what they do. 
Instead, I am writing as fast as I can. 
All this music drips off the ceiling, 
half notes looking for completion in the ear, 
and my wrist wants reprieve. 

6/30/1987, Napa
rev 9/2016


FREEWRITE

And the Arabs invented the idea 
of absolute zero out of one. 
They tied it up into knots 
because the desert has so little water. 
I'm looking for an oasis in the stars. 
A black hole is like a binary skater who, 
spinning with legs and arms akimbo, 
suddenly tucks in close to her body, 
and increases the drag and spin 
until light can no longer escape.

6/30/1987, Napa
rev 9/2016



He who makes a revolution 
in South America 
is sowing the sea.


When it snows in La Paz, 
the government will fall – 
said the Bolivian tin miners.

INFLATION 

Bolívar paying his hotel bills 
with bricks of dollars in a handbag, 
paper money by the pound.

Se me cayó, what I've lost
The multicolored balloons 
along the Reforma—
marionettes dancing 
mimicking the tourists.


6/30/1987, Napa
rev 9/2016

No comments: