Wednesday, February 12, 2003

DEEP NOVEMBER


DEEP NOVEMBER

Dark morning, deep November,
low clouds threatening rain.
We sat by the firebox, slurping tea from a spoon,
she twiddled her hair into long white snakes,
while arguing with the dead:
blaming Cromwell, deValera, the Anglosaxonsandjutes.
An unnamed thing stirred at the pit of the stomach.
Who were they, the long dead?
I scooted around on my back the way kids do,
my robe, a red stain on the gray floor.
The cats hunched up, wanting in. No, she told us.
A bird banged at the kitchen sill.
Too much effort to fly, the air, palpable.
Calm before the storm, my grandmother said.
That knocking is the dead wanting in.
Shivers up my spine, a ghost story in the daytime.
The rain sobbing, not God, but the rain and me
crying—for no earthly reason.
Dead man walking on your grave.
Come closer to the fire, child, she said.
The small sorrows of my seven years welled up and found a thirst.
The birds and the cats, the rain and me, all wanting in.
All t’ings come in t’rees, she warned,
she never could say the T-Haiches  right.
I wanted to undwind her hair snakes,
and laughed at her  loss of “H”es,
Tír na-nÓg, she said in Irish, Land of the ever-young.
And here we are, west of the west. Samhain.
Be careful, the door to the otherworld are still open—
She cautioned me: “H” was the letter of the Lord.
A silent ladder to the sky. The sound of breath. Inspiration.
I climbed the first leafy rung. Plucked an apple. The sky breathing.
A knocking at the door. An scéal? No news is good news.
But the gates were already open.
My drunken uncle burst through the door,
giggling hysterically, Did you hear? Kennedy was shot!
My grandmother’s small sob, played over and over,
her hands fluttering like flocks of useless birds.
A sacred letter had fallen from the sky.

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